I’m Jessie Jing. To me, home has always been an abstract concept. It wasn’t until the age of 23, that I truly grasped what this term represents. I had never really focused on the word ‘home’ before; it was just a place I would return to at the end of the day. Maybe I subconsciously avoided the true essence of that subject.
I have lived in three different countries: Hong Kong, Malaysia, and England. Growing up, these relocations – at different vital periods in my childhood – had inherently numbed my sense of home. It wasn’t easy for me to name one place ‘home’; I’d have many added annotations when describing the place, to clearly define to what extent that place was my ‘home’.
However, what I eventually learned about ‘home’, is this:
Besides being a physical place, which you can return to, feel comfortable and safe in, and feel like you belong to; ‘Home’ for me is a state of mind. I could not sincerely call any of those physical places my ‘home’, because at the time I was not ‘at home’ with myself. There were constant geographical changes and a flurry of new things, people, and cultures entertaining my life. I created a habit of constantly searching for something; leaving behind what I can for what I could. I could not settle or rest in any place peacefully, because I was not at peace with myself. I was not at ‘home’; I was not with myself.
When it all finally came together, I realised that each of these places and people was a component of ‘home’; it was simply down to my acceptance and courage to care for these components.
Home, I believe, starts with yourself. You, first and foremost, are your ‘home’.